All in the FAMILY
by The Anime kid and Chaos Girl
Summary: Raven's cousins come for a visit! YAY First Teen Titans Fic! R&R now please! CHAPPY 6 IS UP! (sans Terra bashing)
1. The letter

Disclaimer: We do not own the Teen Titans. **cough ** wish we did… **cough** Now it's time to sing the "Don't Sue Us" song! OHHHHH Don't sue us! We did nothing to you! Don't Sue Us! In the name of the Red, White, and Blue! OK, we're done.

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All In the F!!!A!!!M!!!!I!!!L!!!Y

Chapter One~ The letter

"No! We're NOT getting the veggie pizza platter! We're getting the meat lovers pork special!" Cyborg shouted. The half man, half robot crossed his arms. A green teen (Ha! Green Teen! That rhymes! I might be a poet, and don't really know it!) seemed to be getting angry over this, partly because he's a vegetarian, and partly because he's been almost every animal that ever existed. 

"No way, man! I am not about to eat some poor slaughtered little pig!" Beast Boy shouted back. It was yet another usual evening at Titans Tower. (Which, for those who don't know, is shaped like a giant T.) Cyborg and Beast Boy were arguing over what to eat, Raven was meditating (when is she not?), Starfire was watching the television, and Terra was in the training room. Robin had disappeared to meet with the chief of police.

"My friends! Please do not start the mean talking! I am trying to potato the couch!" The Tameranian girl said, leaning over the couch. BB and Cyborg grunted, and turned away from each other. Starfire turned off the TV and walked over to Raven. 

"Raven! Do you—" she started.

"No, Starfire. I don't think Robin is coming back for a while." Raven said, opening one eye. She returned to her chanting. Starfire sighed and went back to watching "The Slightly Strange Parental Units", a Tameranian spin off of an Earth TV show.

25 minutes later, the door slid up and Robin came in, carrying an envelope.

"Robin! You have returned from your meeting with the king of police! Oh, and you have also gathered the postage of letters and bills! Is there something in there for me?" Starfire said as she happily floated up to Robin.

"Star, for the last time, it's the _chief_ of police, not the king of police. Oh, and it's not for you, it's actually for Raven." Said the four-foot tall boy who smelled like cheap hair gel. Raven opened her eyes, and went over to Robin. The telekinetic Goth put one eyebrow up as she opened the letter.

**Dear Cousin Raven,**

How are you? We fine. And guess what! We are coming to visit you on Friday. Mother wishes to find out how you are living. We are anxious to meet these friends of yours. Do you have any advice on transportation from Azarath to Gotham City? If so, please reply. Oh, and we are bringing you some meditation jewels to help with your 'problem'.

Love,

Peter, Oswin, Claire, Mona

Raven gasped, and dropped the letter. As soon as the letter touched the floor, the room suddenly engulfed in flames. The fire alarm was blaring. She looked around in panic. _Wait… this is a vision! _She thought. _Okay, calm down. Nothing is going to happen. You are going to open your eyes, and everything will be back to normal. Control, Raven. Control! _

"Raven? Raven! Are you okay?" 

"Huh? What…?" Raven said, not quite back in touch with reality yet. She was on the floor, and Beast Boy was supporting her.

"What happened?" he asked.

"…Nothing…" Raven said, rubbing her head. Terra walked into the room. 

"Oh, yeah! High score! Can ya beat _this_, Cyborg?" she said, about to show Cyborg a printout. She stopped by Beast Boy holding Raven on the ground.

"Umm… Did I miss something? Since when did you two—" Raven and Beast Boy quickly got up and scrambled to chairs far away from each other, blushing. 

"Raven! What did your letter of postage say?" Starfire asked. Raven picked up the letter.

"Looks like my cousins are coming to town." Raven said in that monotone voice we all know and love (or not).

"Glorious! I would love to meet the offspring of your parent's sibling!" The girl from Tameran exclaimed with glee.

"Dude! I didn't know Raven had cousi—" Beast Boy blurted out right before Robin elbowed him. Raven rolled her eyes, and headed off towards her room. She slammed the door shut. Her outburst made a bookcase glow black and then slam into the wall. Raven telekinetically righted it and slid down on the door. _Why are they coming now? _She thought.

(A/n: IT'S TIME TO AUTHOR THE NOTES!!!!

TAK: Well that's the first chapter of our story! Didja like it? Huh? Huh? Didja? Didja? DIDJA?!

CGL Yeah, and it's our first time writing a TT story, so BE NICE! Review please!

TAK: Oh yeah, and the humor part comes when her cousins arrive! BWEHEHEHEHE!!

CG: CHANGE THAT LAUGH! IT'S ANNOYING!

TAK: Fine! BWAHAHAHAHA!) 


	2. Suprise, suprise!

Disclaimer: We don't own Teen Titans. We will never own Teen Titans. GET IT THROUGH YOUR THICK HEADS!!!

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Chapter 2~ Surprise, surprise! 

Raven sat in the lotus position, chanting and thinking. She was at the bottom of the pool on the roof, surrounded by a bubble of black energy. _Azarath, Metrion, Zinthos… Okay, let's see… My cousins are coming to Gotham for some strange reason, and the Tower is going to be on fire sometime. This is all very confusing… It's Thursday, and they said they are coming on Friday. And what is with them saying I have a _

'problem'? Just because I can't express emotions as easily as all the others doesn't mean it's a problem! A faint sound of an alarm broke her concentration. Raven flew out of the pool, ready to grab the first fire extinguisher she could find. Instead, she heard The Boy Wonder's voice.

"TITANS! TROUBLE!" 

Raven ran to the control room. Everyone was there, looking at the giant screen. Three teens, one with crazy pink hair, a really short one with a spider-like thing on his back, and a huge guy that looked like some hairy prehistoric animal, were causing trouble in the city.

"Looks like the H.I.V.E. has struck again." Robin said, zooming in on the scene. "Alright, then! Titans! Move out!"

*********

"Bwahahahahahaha! Nothing like A fresh batch of turmoil in the morning!" The little annoying H.I.V.E. member named Gizmo laughed.

"Actually, I prefer a fresh cup of kick-ass!" Robin's voice echoed from somewhere the H.I.V.E. students couldn't see.

"A cup of kick-ass? That doesn't even make sen—" Before Gizmo could finish, Robin jumped down and kicked him in the face.

"Honestly, Robin. I think your one-liners are getting lamer and lamer." Said the pink haired one named Jinx. She charged up a disruption wave, and shot it at Robin. Starfire swooped in, and picked up the 4 foot tall one who smelled like cheap hair gel. She dropped him near the others, and flew back. The Tameranian girl stopped right in front of her.

"Please refrain from making fun of Robin's single-lines and destroying the town, as it angers me." Ol Pinky busted up laughing. 

"Hahahahaha! What, did we offend your widdle Robbie-poo?" she said in between laughing. Starfire's eyes glowed green and she shot two energy blasts at Jinx, and her hair caught on fire.

"Do not EVER say that! Only the evil feline-like one calls him that!" Jinx started running around in circles, screaming 'My hair! MY HAIR! My beautiful pink hair is on fire!' mixed with a couple choice words mumbled under her breath. Meanwhile, Terra was dealing with Mammoth. 

"C'mon, big boy, is that the best you got?" She said, riding a chunk of rock. Mammoth roared, beat his chest, and ran towards her. Terra stopped, and started laughing. The giant was jumping up and down trying to reach her, causing the earth to shake.

"Aw, come on! Jump for it!" she teased. "Huh? Where'd he go?" Mammoth was no longer there. He was on top of a building, holding one of those mini water tower things. 

"Heh, heh, heh…" He laughed and threw it.

"Uh-oh!" She said. Using her powers, she lifted up chunks of pavement and deflected the tank.

***

"Azarath, Metrion, Zinthos!" Raven shouted, and sent 10 trashcans flying at Gizmo. He pressed a button, and a little mini robot with a giant magnet on it came whizzing out around the corner, and attracted all the trashcans at it.

"Ha ha! You can't defeat me, ya scuz munchin' phlemball!"

__

Damn it! Raven thought.

All of a sudden, she heard something whizzing toward her. She turned around and saw a rocket coming straight at her. It was going too fast and she didn't have enough time to use her powers to deflect it back or even move out of the way! Raven put up her arms defensively, bracing for impact. And then, the rocket… stopped. Just stopped. In fact, everything around her was stopped. The other titans as well as the H.I.V.E. members had stopped. The atmosphere, the buildings, everything had kind of a bluish tint, and the air was shimmering, wavy-like. After looking around in front of her in confusion, she stopped and smiled. (Which is kinda rare for Raven. It's a surprise nothing blew up! He he he)

__

Oswin. Raven turned around, and saw 4 cloaked figures, floating in the air. One with light-blue hair and a long braid draped over his shoulder in a hooded black cloak was out in front, holding out his palm towards the rocket. The boy's eyes were glowing blue, and a little glowing pendant was floating out in front of him. Raven redirected the missile towards Gizmo, and gave an OK signal. The boy put down his arm, and at the same time, his eyes changed back to normal, even though he still had blue eyes. The pendant dropped back onto his chest, the air no longer shimmered and lost its bluish tint.

"Heh heh heh…" Gizmo laughed evilly, unaware of what just happened. When the rocket came zooming towards him, he looked up in surprise, and it exploded right in front of him. After the annoying shrimp was vanquished, the other cloaked figures (who are Raven's cousins for those who haven't figured that out yet) flew off to help the rest of the titans. Raven floated down to the ground and so did Oswin. She pulled off her hood, and then put her hands on her hips.

"Took you long enough." She said.

"Don't be silly! We're a day early!" He laughed, and walked up to give her a hug. She blushed and then said,

"Oswin, stop it! Don't embarrass me in front of my adversaries! Now, come on!" Raven then flew off to find her comrades. Oswin flew after her, calling,

"Well, excuse me for being happy to see you!"

Beast Boy changed into a falcon and flew at Mammoth. Mammoth swung a giant arm at him, and knocked him out of the sky. A rock pillar with Cyborg and Terra on it came at them, and Cyborg shot a sonic blast at him. He caught him off guard, and knocked him off of the building. Or so he thought. Mammoth jumped off the edge of the building he had been holding on to, launching straight for their rock pillar. He jumped too low, and ended up punching the middle of it, crumbling it to pieces. Cyborg and Terra jumped off towards the nearest building. Mammoth, using his ability to never fall to the ground (at least that's what's been happening so far…) swam through the air by grabbing falling rocks, made it to another building and swung up from a pole onto the rooftop. Everyone clapped.

"Amazing!" Terra said sarcastically. Beast Boy held up a sign that read "10.0".

"Uh-oh…" he said, as Mammoth became very enraged. Mammoth jumped to their building (He should be called the amazing flying Buff-Dude instead of Mammoth!). They all separated and ducked out of the way as he came charging at them. Then all of a sudden, he stopped, and began punching the air, wildly. Beast Boy waved his arms.

"Umm… Dude… we're over here… HELLO?!"

Suddenly, a figure with a red cloak and a hood pulled over their head appeared in front of Mammoth. Mammoth lunged for him, and the figure simply pulled back—er, in his case, _floated_ back. He kept going, punching at the stranger, and he kept floating back until the red-cloaked wonder stopped. Mammoth frowned for a second, and then yelled out as the ground beneath him disappeared and he plummeted down to the ground.

"Curse you snacks! CURSE YOU!!!!!" Mammoth yelled.

"Ookay then…" Terra commented. Cyborg walked up to the One who wears strange red clothing.

"Who are you, and what did you DO?" He asked. Raven's cousin replied by taking off his hood and bowing.

"I am Peter, Illusionist of Castle Alkanos. Glad to be of service." Said Peter. Terra appeared next to him suddenly and her eyes got all googly like Starfire and Raven's did when they met Aqua Lad. Beast Boy quickly pulled her away from him, steaming. 

"Oh, you must be one of Raven's cousins. I'm Cyborg." Said Cyborg, putting out his hand for him to shake. Peter took Cyborg's hand and shook it.

"Well met, um… _Cyborg_." He said. Cyborg walked back over to his friends.

"Who is that?" Beast Boy asked.

"That's home-dawg from Albuquerque." 

Meanwhile…

Jinx shot dozens of disruption waves at Robin, angrily, while her hair smoked. Robin threw a disk that put up an energy forcefield, blocking her attacks. He ducked behind her and tried to hit her with his Bo(w?) stick. Jinx rolled under his legs and blasted him with a massive wave, sending him flying towards a brick wall. Starfire came towards Jinx, and shot a starbolt at the ground beneath her, exploding chunks right in her face. Jinx's eyes glowed pink and a tree toppled over and came crashing down on Starfire. Suddenly lightning struck the tree and burnt it to a crisp. A girl with short, brown hair in a dark green cloak was floating above and behind it, with both arms extended towards where the tree was. Jinx and Robin were in the middle of intense had-to-hand combat. Another girl, this time with long black hair and two purple braids in a purple cloak flew up behind them. She clapped her hands together and a wave pulsated outwards. Suddenly, a statue of a man on a horse that had been around the corner came galloping up and rammed into Jinx, sending her flying. The statue went back to where it was, the girl clapped her hands again, and it immobilized. She walked up to Robin and shook his hand. 

"I'm Claire."

"Hi, I'm Robin." The other girl shook Starfire's hand and introduced herself as Mona. The others came flying, running, and galloping to them. 

"Let's go back to the Tower and order some pizza." Robin said.

*******************************************************************

A/N: It's time to Author the Notes! 

The Animé Kid (TAK): Wow that was a looooong chapter!

Chaos Girl (CG): Yup! I hope you guys are enjoying it so far. REVIEW PLEASE!!!


	3. Home Movies!

Disclaimer: What is wrong with you? We just told you! WE DON'T OWN THE TEEN TITANS! Gosh! Do you have severe short-term memory issues or something?

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Chapter 3~ Home movies!

The titans plus 4 new arrivals pulled up to the island in the T-car. (How they all fit in there, I do not know.) Raven's cousins got their luggage out of the trunk, and floated to the door, while the rest walked. Starfire flew up to Mona, jabbering about how much she appreciates her saving her. In fact, she had been jabbering for the last 15 minutes.

"Oh, I honestly and for truly really do thank you! This is just wonderful! You and Terra and your sister and perhaps Raven and I can all go to the mall of shopping, or to the Fingernail maintenance salon, and do all sorts of the 'hanging out'!" Meanwhile Terra had been hovering around Peter who was starting to get scared, and was hiding behind Oswin.

"So, what's your favorite color? Mine's red! Just like your cute little cape! Hey, did you bring any extra ones? Maybe we could wear the same thing and look like twins! Wouldn't that be cool? Wouldn't it?" Terra rambled. 

"That girl is freaking me out…" Oswin pushed him off.

"Oh, quit being such a scaredy-cat!" He put on a coy little smile and whispered, "Besides, maybe you can get yourself a girlfriend." Peter scoffed. Beast Boy and Cyborg were having a burping contest, while Robin was showing Claire some of his kung fu. Raven walked in behind all of them, massaging her temples. _Why me?_ She thought. After they all plopped down on the couch, Robin went to get the phone to call for pizza. (Which is strange since they JUST had pizza like what? 2 days ago?) 

"I'm so happy to see you, Raven! We haven't talked in like, for_ever_!" Claire said.

"Yeah, well, I've been busy." Raven stated simply.

"Doing what?"

"Stuff."

"What stuff?"

"STUFF stuff." Claire put her hands on her hips.

"C'mon, Raven! We're cousins! We're supposed to TALK to each other!" Raven grunted and opened up a book.

"Well, I'VE been practicing my vivacity to inanimate objects powers, AND I won the Miss Azarath Beauty contest!" (I have NO idea what to call her powers…)

"Fascinating." Raven said, turning a page. Claire's face boiled in pure annoyance.

"Damn it Raven! What have YOU done lately?!" 

"I've learned how to make 7 different favors of herbal tea." Claire threw her hands up in defeat and sank into the couch. She amused herself for the next couple minutes, by creating little soldiers out of different foods in the kitchen, and mentally ordering them to lose Raven's page. Robin arrived soon with the pizza, and they decided to sit in the living room instead of the kitchen. 

"So what do you guys want to do?" Robin asked. Claire put on an evil smile, and stood up.

"I just happened to bring along some _home movies_ of Raven and us!" She said, glaring at Raven. Her brothers and Mona's eyebrows went up, while Raven's eyes widened in horror.

"You… wouldn't!" 

"I would." The black-and-pink haired girl mouthed.

"That's cool with me." Robin said.

"I would LOVE to view the recorded chronicles of Friend Raven's younger years!" Starfire squealed with glee. Before Raven could stop her, Claire shoved the tape into the VCR, and a mini Raven with pigtails appeared on the screen.

"Aww, you were soo cute! What HAPPENED?" Beast Boy laughed obnoxiously. Raven telekinetically slammed a cereal box into the side of his head. Oswin got up from the couch, disappeared, and then reappeared holding a bowl of popcorn in 2.2 seconds.

"There are some advantages to being able to speed up time for yourself… I don't want to miss a minute of this!" He said, shoving popcorn into his mouth. A mini Peter ran down a hall, holding a pot and two wooden spoons, with mini Raven and they entered a room where A woman was sitting on a chair, reading a book.

"Look at mee!" Mini Raven said, as Mini Peter started banging on the pot with the spoons and Mini Raven did a ridiculous dance, screaming, 'I'M A MUFFIN! I'M A MUFFIN!' and making a complete idiot out of herself. Beast Boy and Cyborg were laughing their asses off, Terra giggled, Starfire chuckled, and even Robin tried hard not to laugh. Meanwhile, Raven's face had turned completely red in embarrassment.

"Hahahaha! Look, Muffin Girl is turning into a tomato!" BB laughed. It kind of went on like that for a while. Mini Raven did something funny, everyone laughed, and Raven was totally mortified except for a few times when a laugh escaped her, and blew the lights out. After all the pizza was gone, and the video was spent, Everyone yawned and said good night. As Claire passed by Raven, she whispered,

"Sorry I had to do that. Just don't be mean to me anymore, because I have plenty more where that came from!" Raven smiled and went to her room.

(A/N: IT'S TIME TO AUTHOR THE NOTES!

TAK: Yes, we know that was a short chapter.

CG: Raven's a muffin! Hahahaha!

TAK: Thanks for those who bothered to review!

CG: TAK has to do his homework now because he's a procrastinator!

TAK: Bye bye! Review!


	4. Carnival

Disclaimer: For the last friggin time. We do NOT own the Teen Titans, nor will we EVER own the Teen Titans, so just GET OVER IT! 

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Chapter 4~ Carnival

The next day, Raven was awakened by someone shaking her violently.

"Get off of me Starfire!"

"Please get up, Raven! It is time to begin Morning Nutritional Intake period before we embark to the wonderful land of fun and frolicking!" Starfire said, zooming downstairs to the kitchen. _What wonderful land of fun and frolicking? _Raven thought._ Well, I might as well get up and see what this is all about._ The purple haired girl (at least I THINK it's purple…) hopped out of bed and went to go take a shower. As she stepped out of the shower, she realized she forgot to get a towel. Raven ran down the hall towards her room, and turned a corner, only to see Beast Boy in a towel with a shower cap on, holding a rubber ducky, walking towards the bathroom she just left. His eyes turned the size of The Extra Large, Extra Meat, Meat Lover's special with meat sprinkles and bacon bits that Cyborg gets. 

"GAHHH!!!!!" He shouted, falling over in a heap. Raven turned into a tomato again and flew into her room. 

***************

Raven walked into the kitchen and sat down in a chair, still bright red, but hiding her face by putting on her hood. Starfire was putting eyedropper stuff in BB's eyes because of the over-stretchage caused by reasons he would not speak about. All of Raven's cousins were downstairs as well. Oswin was reading the comic section and laughing, Mona was helping Cyborg cook by zapping the food with mini lightning strikes, Peter was trying to escape from Terra's hug of death, and Claire was watching TV. Robin was on the roof "swimming in the tank of pool for muscle-bulging purposes".

"Hey, everybody! It's time for Cyborg's Special Recipe Homemade Hotcakes!" Cyborg declared, putting plates piled high with pancakes. Robin walked in, wearing his costume that was slightly damp from not drying off properly. Beast Boy looked disgusted at the food.

"Dude! Is that _butter_ on this?!" He asked. But Cyborg was ready for him.

"Yes it is. Butter. Made from milk, not meat."

"Milk that comes from cows. Milk that could be used to feed poor little baby cows."

"Oh, so now you're defending the baby cows now! Have you ever BEEN a baby cow?"

"Yes I have! When I was a baby!" Raven was beginning to get annoyed.

"Alright, ladies. It's time to shut up now." She snapped. She turned her head to the direction of a squeaked voice. 

"Raven… Can't… breathe…!" Peter squeaked, being squeezed extra-tight by Terra the death hugger. Raven rolled her eyes.

"Terra, stop trying to suffocate my cousin." Terra looked hurt.

"I would _never_ do anything like that to my cutesy-wutesy Petey-bear!" The blonde girl said, letting go of Peter, who was gasping like a fish out of water. Beast Boy marched up to Terra, turned into a gorilla, picked her up, put her in a chair farther away from Peter, and sat in-between them, looking back and forth suspiciously. Later…

"Glorious! The time had arrived to embark on our 30 earth minute long journey to the land of fun and frolicking!" Starfire proclaimed. 

"WHAT THE HELL IS THIS LAND OF FUN AND FROLICKING?!" Raven shouted, blowing Starfire's red hair back.

"We're going to the carnival! I think I can win you another giant chicken! He he he… it's got tons of rides and roller coasters and all sorts of good stuffs!" Beast boy said, winking at Raven.

"Oh god! Not there again! Never never never! You are NOT dragging me to some stupid carnival!" Raven said, crossing her arms. 

*******

"I cannot believe you just dragged me to another stupid carnival." Raven said with her arms still crossed. Her and the other Titans were sitting in a roller coaster car while it was climbing up the first hill. Cyborg and Beast Boy had huge grins on, sitting next to the gothic girl who could not believe she was just dragged to another stupid carnival. Terra and Peter and Oswin were sitting in the front, while Robin and Claire were sitting behind them, and Starfire and Mona were sitting behind Robin and Claire. The Tameranian teen glared at Claire angrily.

"Friend Mona. Do you also believe that your sister is sitting excessively close to Robin?" Starfire asked, not averting her death glare at the black-and-pink haired one.

"Mm." Mona said, looking out of the side of the car at the children playing nostalgically. The car ominously stopped at the top of the hill. Cyborg and BB were practically bouncing up and down in their seats with the giant grins plastered on their faces. That was when Raven realized how high up the ride was. _Wow, look at all the people down there. All the tiny people. All the very, very far down people. Actually everything looks far away. Is the air getting thinner up here? Oh God. Oh God oh God oh God. Something is going to happen, I just know it! The rails are going to break and the car is going to fly off and crash into something and we're gonna die. We're gonna die a horrible, terrible, painfully bloody death._ Raven shut her eyes as the car plummeted down the track, blowing her cheeks back so you could see her gums. Her stomach got tossed around as if it were in a dryer on high spin, as they zoomed through all the loops and turns and twists. And then it was over. 

"Oh yeah! That was awesome! Hey, Raven, c'mon, I'm gonna win you another giant chicken!" BB said, grabbing Raven by the arm. Terra was dragging a Peter tied-up with rope, heading towards the tunnel of love.

"Come along now, honey-bunchkins! We're gonna miss the next boat!" she said.

"Why me? What did I do wrong?" Peter sobbed, looking up at the sky. Robin and Claire were also heading towards the tunnel. Starfire's eyes narrowed. 

"Come, friend. I suggest we keep our optical units on your sister and Robin." She said, and they snuck into a secret back door in the tunnel of love. Oswin and Cyborg were the only ones left standing by the roller coaster.

"Looks like we're on our own, buddy! What do you wanna do?" Cyborg asked. Oswin looked up, and rubbed his chin, thinking. Then he smiled evilly.

"How about we pull some pranks on people?" he suggested. Cyborg thought about it for about 3 seconds, and then put on the same evil grin, and they tiptoed off to plan their prank spree, snickering. 

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(A/N: IT'S TIME TO AUTHOR THE NOTES!!!!

TAK: Sorry we haven't updated in a while. My Internet service got shut off until today, AND I sprained my knee!

CG: But we still love you, cripple!

TAK: **whacks CG with crutch**

CG: OWWWW!

TAK: **hands clasped together like kung-fu master** Never underestimate the power of the crutches. 

CG: Oh and please review!)


	5. Michief, Spying, and POODLES!

Disclaimer: Do I even have to say it? 

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Chapter 5~ Mischief, Spying, and… POODLES!? 

Beast Boy tossed yet another chicken into the pile. The green elf was dashing back and forth from carnival game to carnival game, throwing giant chickens into the pile that Raven was now buried in.

"Oh, yeah! I'm on fire baby!" he shouted.

"Mmt mm mt mmf mmr! (Get me out of here!)" Raven's muffly muffled voice said.

"Hold on a sec, I'm almost breaking the record!" Beast Boy yelled without turning from his carnival games, still tossing chickens. 

"Mm mt! Mrmmrmot, Mrmrmrmon, MMINTHOS! (Damn it! Azarath, Metrion, ZINTHOSS!)" Raven shouted, the chickens exploding off of her with the 'INTHOSS'. Beast Boy turned to see an enraged Azarathian girl running at him with the hammer from the nearby 'Test your strength' thing. BB erupted with an unmanly scream, turned into a mole, and frantically dug into the ground. Raven hit the hole where he plunged underneath the ground. BB popped up at another spot and Raven ran for it and hit the spot where he was. He popped up at yet another spot, and so on, so forth. It went on a lot like the 'Bop the Weasel' game. Meanwhile… 

"Starfire, I REALLY don't think—" 

"Shh! We must keep silent on this surveillance mission!"

Starfire was dressed up in a tree disguise, looking out onto the boats with her binoculars, while Mona was dressed as… dun dun… BALLERINA GIRL! 

"You owe me big time." She hissed with her eye twitching, holding her pose. 

"Oh! Oh! I think I've spotted them! No… Wait, is that them? No…" Starfire looked from boat to boat. She looked at Terra and Peter's boat for a second. Terra was trying desperately to kiss Peter, and the boy was pushing her away. He lost. The disgusted Tameranian quickly averted her gaze.

"Star! They went that way!" Ballerina Mona said, pointing towards Robin and Claire passing by the exit on the outside.

"Quickly!" Starfire the tree grabbed Ballerina Mona's arm and they flew out of the tunnel.

***************

"Aw, yeah! This is gonna be good!" Cyborg said, admiring his prank trap. 

"Umm, what exactly is going to be good again?" Oswin asked the end of Cyborg that was sticking out of a big blue tent that said 'Happy Joy Fun Land'. The tin man jumped back out, holding up a chart with his left hand and a long pointer with his right. He cleared his throat and smacked the board with the pointer.

"The Happy Joy Fun Land prank is a very ingenious procedure. As the unsuspecting victims walk in, their molecular structure will be scanned with infared rays, and the exact angle of the pie's trajectory to their face will be calculated and then transmitted to the pie launcher instantly."

"Oww! You're making my brain hurt!" Oswin said, clutching his head. Cyborg flung the board and the pointer behind him and the sound of a cat screeching could be heard.

"Oh. Sorry. Anyway, basically, someone walks in, and they get a pie in the face." The blue-braided boy grinned mischievously.

"I know JUST who to prank! He he he…" he said, flying off. 

"Hey! Wait for me!"

Let us check up on what Robin and Claire are doing…

****************

"So, you're saying that you can make _anything _become mobile and do your bidding?" Robin asked. He and the girl with the black/purple hairdo were sitting at a patio table by a food place. They had not in fact gone to the tunnel of love for the… well, tunnel of love part. They had gone for the ICE CREAM! (Oh yeah! Aren't they just so cool?) 

"Pretty much, yeah." Claire replied, going psycho on her Drumstick. (You know, the ice cream cone coated in chocolate and nuts?) "You know, this is really good! I don't think they have 'Drumsticks' in Azarath!" 

"Umm, Claire? You got some ice cream on your face… Okay, you have a LOT of ice cream on your face…" Claire actually put down her Drumstick for all of 4 seconds, looking for a napkin, shrugged, and started eating it again. 

"I feel bad about not asking Star to come with us…" The Boy Wonder said to the Drumstick Maniac.

"Oh, **munch, munch** I'm sure she's **munch, munch** okay. She's hanging **munch, munch** out **munch, munch** with my sister, **munch, munch** remember?" 

"I guess you're right."

Meanwhile, Starfire and Mona were hiding in the nearby bushes.

"Star, do you really need those binoculars? I mean, they're right there." Mona whispered, giving the green-eyed girl a classic Raven look. (Hmm! Must run in the family!) 

"Oh. I thought you were always supposed to do the surveillance missions with vision enhancement devices. At least, that is what the glowing box of knowledge and entertainment has shown me." 

"Shh! I can't hear what they're saying!"

"I cannot see them! What is happening?" Mona and Starfire scrambled in the bush, trying to see what was going on. Starfire ended up in front, just in time to see Robin leaning in towards Claire.

"Hold still! I'm trying to get it off!" Is what she did not hear. A bloodcurdling scream along with a pillar of green light erupting into the sky made Robin, along with everyone within a 5-block radius of the café, turned around to see what was happening.

"Starfire?" Robin said. Starfire was hanging out of the bush backwards facing up at Robin.

"H-hello, R-robin…" Mona got knocked to the back of the bush, and she was trying to sneak away. Unfortunately, Claire spotted her. The girl's eyes narrowed as she marched up to her sister and grabbed the end of her cloak/cape. 

"Where do you think _you're_ going?" 

******

"BEAST BOY!!!" Raven shouted, flying after him with the mallet. BB changed into an eagle and flew over to the… dun dun… CIRCUS TENT!! Of doom! (Oh, the horror! Oh the unspeakable corny entertaining horror!) Raven flew into the tent.

"HAS ANYONE SEEN AN ANNOYING LITTLE GREEN ELF OR GREEN-LIKE ANIMAL IN HERE?!" She shouted with a psycho killer look on her face.

"Uhh, yeah, He went that-a-way." Said Jo Jo the ringleader.

"Thank you, Jo Jo. And when I get there, I am going to Kill Bill—I mean Beast Boy." As Raven flew off to Kill BB, the familiarly blue-haired Jo Jo snickered. _You're falling right into my trap… BWAHAHAHAHAA!_

******

"Oh, come on Petey-bear! You know you love me!" Terra said, twirling Peter's blonde hair with her finger.

"Look, Terra. You're a nice girl and all, but you know—" 

"Oh, I knew it! You hate me! WAAAAH!!!" bawled Terra, with tears flooding the boat. 

"Stop it! You're going to sink the boat!" said the alarmed Peter looking left to right helplessly in his tied-up state. This made Terra sob even louder.

"YOU HATE ME! NO ONE LOVES ME! I'M JUST AN UGLY GIRL WHO GETS ON EVERYBODY'S NERVES!" She cried and cried and finally Peter sighed in defeat.

"Okay. Maybe you're not so bad." Terra stopped crying instantly and glomped onto Peter.

"You love me! Oh, yay! We can get married and live happily ever after!" Peter chuckled nervously as the girl nuzzled him. _Why must I be tortured so? …Wait…why don't I feel like running away? I can't possibly _like_ this!_

******

Claire finished of her Drumstick and tossed it into a trashcan while still holding onto the end of Mona's cloak.

"You can let go now..." said the green-clad brunette.

"Why were you and Starfire spying on us?" Claire asked.

"Well, you see, umm, Starfire, she, umm…"

"I NOTICED THAT YOU AND ROBIN WERE SITTING EXCESSIVELY CLOSE TO EACH OTHER IN THE TERRIBLE FRIGHTENING SPEED RIDE AND YOU WENT TOWARDS THE LOVE CANAL AND I DID NOT KNOW THAT YOU WERE JUST GOING FOR THE ICE CREAM I THOUGHT THAT…that…that…" Starfire rambled, and then looked down. Robin looked as though he was about to say something when suddenly an explosion went off and people started screaming.

"Titans! Go!" shouted Robin even though there was only one Titan plus two non-Titan-but-still-battle-ready people. Starfire, Mona and Claire flew off and Robin ran underneath them.

"Why… can't… I… FLY?!" Robin grumbled sadly, moping over the fact that his name was Robin yet he could not fly. They came to a railing that overlooked the carnival grounds below it. The girls effortlessly flew over it, but Robin hesitated. Then he jumped off, spread his arms out, and shouted,

"I BELIEVE I CAN FLY!!!!!!!" Needless to say, he plummeted down towards the ground.

"Oh no! I don't believe I can die!" Then, Starfire swooped down to his rescue. (Did you notice that the girls come to the guys' rescues more often than not?) They arrived on the scene as a man in a doctor's uniform, holding somebody by a leash, while dozens of mechanical _poodles_ were wreaking havoc. The other Titans were battling some of them, Raven going extra hard on them with pie cream smeared all over her face.

"No! It's the Veterinarian!" Robin said. "And he's already leashed someone! Wait, is that Mad Mod?" Mad Mod was hopping around on all fours, growling menacingly and shouting,

"Pip, pip! Cheerio! Fruit Loop! I'm cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs!" 

"Great! More patients to be fixed! Poodle-bots! Attack!" The Veterinarian said, pressing a button. A horde of Poodle-bots came dashing around the corner and lunged for the new arrivals. Mona conjured up a lightning storm, sending many lightning bolts and torrential winds at the Poodle-bots.

"Azarath, Metrion, ZINTHOS!" Raven shouted, and two dark talons came out of the ground behind two Poodle-bots, and crunched into the metal. Cyborg was jumping up into the air and landing on different bots, while hitting some with sonic blasts.

"C'mon, BB! I could _really_ need some help right about now!" he yelled as the poodles began to overwhelm him. Beast Boy was sitting on the ground with his legs crossed, trying to decide whether hurting robotic poodles was cruelty to animals. Peter was standing across from a Poodle-bot, and a kind of showdown-like vibe was in the air. Peter suddenly split off into 10 different Peters, surrounding the Poodle-bot in a circle. The bot lunged at a couple different Peters who disappeared when it came in contact with them. Then they all phased back into one Peter as he came down on the back of it and sliced it right down the middle with a karate chop. 

"Please put a stop this insane destruction!" Star said, floating up behind the Vet. He turned around.

"I don't think so. That's not what the doctor prescribed!" He said, and a white laser shot out of hat little thingy that they have on their heads that's all round and shiny.

"Hey! Leave her alone!" said Robin, charging at the Vet with his retractable bo staff (I got it right this time! Thanks, Raze()!) like a jousting cavalier. Claire had turned the roller coaster into a giant slithering snake that was crushing the hordes of Poodle-bots. Oswin appeared, pendant floating, eyes glowing with a giant net. He disappeared and all the bots disappeared. 5 seconds later, he reappeared doing the victory/peace sign (V).

"I love doing that!" Meanwhile, hundreds of Poodle-bots melted inside of a Hawaiian volcano. Soon, the police arrived and arrested the Vet. An officer was talking to Robin, holding Mad Mod by the leash. 

"I just can't cut the leash." said the officer. Robin pulled out a pouch he snagged from the Vet and popped a pill into Mad Mod's mouth. The leash dissolved and he stood upright with a confused look on his face. 

"Sir, I'm afraid you're under arrest." said the police officer.

"Now wait just a bloody minute! I just got done servin' my time!" He protested as he was handcuffed. As the police filed out to their squad cars and the remaining destroyed Poodle-bots were confiscated. Mona stood there with a pouted lip.

"Starfire?" 

"Yes, Friend Mona?"

"I hate carnivals."

*******************************************************************

(A/N—IT'S TIME TO AUTHOR THE NOTES!!!!

TAK—Well, it looks like we're gonna have to do our author notes like this because FF.Net had to get all gay. This is pretty boring, huh? If you think so, say so in your review cuz I really hate doing this.

CG—Yeah, this is really stupid. Well, do you like it so far? REVIEW PLEASE!)


	6. Public Speaking is bad for you

Disclaimer: …no. I'm not gonna say it! YOU CAN'T MAKE ME! …ALRIGHT, FINE! We don't own Teen Titans! There, ya happy? sniff

****

Chapter 6 Public Speaking is bad for you

"No way." Raven said, crossing her arms.

"Oh, come on, cuz! It'll be fun!" Claire pleaded.

"How is visiting a hellhole of little, hyperactive, annoying kids fun?"

"I love kids!"

"I don't." Suddenly, Terra and Peter appeared.

"I'll go, as long as my lover comes too!" Terra said, yanking Peter close to her. He tried to push her off but she wouldn't budge.

"For the last time, Terra! I am not—" Peter started, but then Terra put on a 'brink-of-tears' face, so he sighed in defeat and she kissed him on the cheek. Beast Boy fumed, and Cyborg had to hold him back from strangling Peter (which is weird, since Peter didn't even want to be her lover, but hey! It's Beast Boy!).

"Are you sure you guys don't want to go?" Cyborg asked.

"NO! I mean… uhh, we have stuff to do. Right, Mona?" Oswin asked.

"Yeah! We have to go to… the place! Yeah, to see that guy about the thing!" Mona said. Cyborg shrugged and walked into the other room. Mona and Oswin 'phew-ed'.

"Now we can set up the Tower while they're gone." Oswin said with that evil glint in his eye.

"Yes! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA!" Mona laughed.

"Umm…Sis? You sound like one of the authors…"

"How did you even sign up for this? You don't even live here!" Raven asked, but her cousin did not reply because se was already marching out to the T-car with Terra, Peter, and the others tagging behind her. Terra hopped in the driver's seat and Claire opened the passenger side door and sat down, saying, 'I know where it is.'

"I _was_ going to have Petey-bear sit there, but that's okay." Peter said 'phew' and wiped his brow.

"He can just sit on my lap!" Terra said, smiling mischievously at Peter. Raven's cousin's eyes bulged and he "fainted". Raven rolled her eyes and half-seriously dragged him into the seat next to her in the back.

"Faker." she told him telepathically.

"I _am_ an illusionist, you know."

"Oh, will you stop making it sound so glamorous? That's so annoying!" Cyborg, Beast Boy, Robin, and Starfire got in after them. Terra drove out into the city. Claire pointed down this street and that street, while Terra occasionally looked back at Peter the Faker. Beast Boy, on the other hand, glared lighting bolts at him. Eventually, they arrived at the school. Everyone got out of the T-car except for Raven.

"I absolutely refuse." Claire's eyes glowed a dark purple and an aura formed around Raven's cloak. It wrapped itself around her and came rolling out of the car. They walked (Well, Raven bounced because she was being taken hostage by her clothing.) into the building. More than a few teachers stopped to gawk as the floating, walking, and bouncing superheroes walked in. The Titanscousins-2 stepped around them and headed into the office.

"Yes, we're the guest speakers for Ms. Strappleberry's class…" said Claire, said to the awestricken secretary who handed them their badges. Well, almost all of them…

"No! I'm being forced to do this against my will!" Raven said, leaning away from the elderly secretary.

"Come now, deary, you must wear a Visitor's Badge."

"What part of 'I was dragged here by my insane cousin' are you not comprehending here?"

"You MUST wear the STICKER!!!"

"NEVER!!!!" Suddenly the short old woman transformed into a large, hulking, evil monster and shouted angry words at Raven. After the shocked girl had her sticker stuck to her forehead, the secretary un-transformed back into a charming, sweet old woman again.

"Have a nice stay at West Gotham Elementary, now!" she said, waving at their retreating backs.

"Scary… woman… evil… so evil…" said Shocked/Hostage/Bouncing Raven, as they turned a corner and stopped by the door to the classroom.

"Uhh… Star? I think that sticker is supposed to go on your shirt, not on your… umm…"

"My, as my on-the-line friend, KingOftheMolePeople627, would say, sexy ass?" Starfire asked. Robin did that thingy when his eyes go all blank and swirly… yeah.

"WHAT ONLINE FRIEND?!"

"Okay, here we go…" Terra turned the doorknob, and revealed a class split up into groups. The teacher was sitting at her desk, her black hair completely covering her face, as she was bending down over the papers she was grading. A redheaded boy spotted them and backed away wide-eyed toward the teacher.

"Ms. Strappleberry! The Teen Titans and some other people are here…" He said meekly.

"Robert, stop telling all these lies!"

Another kid walked up to her desk.

"He's not lying this time!"

Ms. Strappleberry looked up sternly at the boys, saying,

"I've had enough of this. Go back to your seats." As they reluctantly trudged back to their chairs, Terra walked over to the teacher and tapped her on the shoulder. She looked up in surprise.

"Oh! It really is you!"

"You were expecting maybe the tooth fairy?" Claire immediately went to the front of the class and cleared her throat.

"Hello, children. I'm sure all of you have heard of the Teen Titans, right? Well, we have come to talk to you about crime and why you shouldn't talk to strangers. Terra?" Terra looked up from kissing Peter on the lips.

"Huh?"

"TERRA! THERE ARE CHILDREN HERE!"

"Sorry!"

"Come up here and talk to the kids about crime!!"

"Okay, okay! Gosh!" As Terra replaced Claire in the front of the class and everyone turned towards the front, Raven strolled to the back of the room. She sat down in a desk.

"Hey, babe, my name's Alan." said Alan, the kid who she hadn't noticed before. He was dressed in all black, and he looked like a mini version of Raven as a boy and younger and with non-gray skin.

"…Hello." The kid kind of looked left and right with his eyes and then leaned in close to her and said,

"Nice boobs."

"OH MY GOD! YOU LITTLE PERVERT!" she yelled, standing up and practically blowing up the desk she was sitting in. She raised her hand up to slap him but then noticed all the people staring at her.

"Okay. Calm down. Contain yourself." She mentally told herself, sitting back down. Which was hard to hear, since she was imagining exploding the kid's head and setting everything on fire and shooting everything with a machine gun.

"So you wanna go out with me?" Alan said, leaning over again.

"No." she snapped coldly.

"Oh, come on, you know you think I'm hot."

"I do not. Now leave me alone." Raven looked back to the front of the class.

"And ANOTHER thing! What's the point of trying to be a criminal when you KNOW we're gonna just catch you and put you in jail! Crime is STUPID!" Alan leaned over to Raven again.

"Don't even think about it." Raven said after reading his mind and figuring out what he was going to say.

"Baby, you can read my mind all you want." He said with a perverted look on his face. Raven marched up to Claire and pulled her aside.

"Can I kill him? He is a sick twisted little boy who'd mind is WAAAAY down the gutter! I know! I've been there!"

"NO! You cannot kill him! Just think what that would do to your image!"

"Oh, shut up! You sound like Robin!"

"You think so?" Claire said, looking up dreamily.

"You better stop that before Starfire shoves a starbolt in your mouth!" She said, pointing at Starfire who was looking like she did when Robin told her that Kitten wanted to date him. "Can I at least torture him?"

"You think that's BETTER?!" Raven defeatedly walked to a seat far, far away from Alan. Of course, he moved closer to her.

"And now, Starfire is going to tell you why you shouldn't talk to strangers!" Claire said, stepping aside as Starfire flew up to the front.

"Greetings, young ones. I am here to lecture you about the many dangers of speaking to unfamiliar beings. The first thing is that you do not posses the knowledge of what their identity is. They may be a criminal, a murderer, or even a Vimbaz Wala-Wala Gorkshee!" The entire class gave her a blank stare. Well, Terra and Peter didn't notice because the earthmover was glomping on him again, and Peter was busy trying to get her off (what else is new). Meanwhile, Raven had set up a telekinetic wall of dark energy, cutting her chunk of the room from Alan and the other students. Later, after Starfire's confusing jabber, Claire reappeared at the front of the class yet again, and everyone's confused looks disappeared.

"Okay, class. Thank you for being patient. Up next is Robin, who's here to tell you about all the things that superhero-type leaders have to do." Miss I-sign-up-people-to-volunteer-at-schools-for-no-good-reason-without-warning said. Robin approached the front of the room, feeling self conscious that some of the people in the class were taller than him (If he really IS four feet tall!).

"Woo hoo! Move in a forward direction, Robin!" Starfire cheered from the middle of the desks.

"Hello, children. As you know, I'm Robin, leader of the Teen Titans. But being a team leader is not easy. You have to go to meetings with the police department, hold press conferences, blah blah, blah blah blahdiddy blah, blah blah, blah. Blah blah blah blah blah? Blah. Blah blah blah blah blah…" He droned on about all the responsibilities and hardships of being… well… him.

"Hey, psst! Peter!" Terra whispered a little loudly to her good buddy, Peter, who was being forced to sit next to her. He sighed and reluctantly turned his head her way.

"What do you want?" he said in a monotone voice. Terra frowned and elbowed him.

"Sigh. I mean, Yes, dear?"

"Hey, let's get out of this borefest." Peter sat up in his chair.

"You know what? That's the best idea you've had all day." he said, smirking. They both got up and tiptoed out of the room. Meanwhile, everyone in the class had fallen asleep due to Robin's excessive boredom spreading.

"And that is why… Hey! Isn't anyone listening to me?" Everyone answered with a snore.

"Oh, come on! That's just plain rude." Robin crossed his arms and pouted. Starfire walked up to him.

"I listened to your speech, Robin." She said, putting her hands on his shoulders. Awwww. Anywho, Let us check in with Alan and Raven. (lol) Raven had been sitting happily (well, as close to happy as she could get) in her little aclove, while Alan had been trying to break through with various objects (scissors, pencils, smacking it with books), but to no avail.

"COME ON!!! You know you want me! Open up!" He said, banging on the energy cage with his fists.

"I've got a better idea. Azarath, Metrion, ZINTHOS!!" Her little dark prison dissolved, and then Alan was encased in a bubble. He tried yelling and banging on the bubble, but no sound got through. She simply floated him out the door, and telekinetically shut it. She grinned a little too hard and all the lights went out. Again. _Note to self. Stop doing that._ Meanwhile, Terra and Peter were wandering around the school, when all of a sudden, the lights went out. Terra gave a little yelp.

"W-what happened?" she asked nervously.

"Oh, don't worry about it. Raven probably smiled again."

"Hmm. Could you stop squeezing my hand so hard? I'm sure my fingers would LOVE some circulation right about now." Peter did that trademark animé "rub back of neck/blush" combo.

"Heh heh. Sorry."

The power came back on after the world's fastest janitor fixed the power fuse, and replaced every light bulb in the school in less than ten seconds. They really ought to pay him more.

Just then, Beast Boy came out of the classroom and saw Peter and Terra smiling at each other.

"What… Terra? What's going on?"

"Nothing! NOTHING IS GOING ON!" Peter exclaimed. Beast Boy gave him a hateful frown and went over the water fountain. Terra was kind of confused, looking back and forth at Peter and Beast Boy like she was stuck holding a bomb. The Titans plus Claire came out of the classroom and kids were throwing rumpled papers and garbage at them.

"What happened?" Peter turned to his cousin and his sister.

"I made Raven give a speech about traffic safety and… well… lets just say that the kids in Mrs. Strappleberry's class don't like her anymore," Claire responded.

"Friends?" Starfire asked quietly, surprising the rest of them. "I would wish to leave this place of mean, hateful, garbage hurling young ones. Raven, I believe it is you who has the power to glide the shadows?"

Raven twitched, wanting to smile, but reminding herself that she may blow out the lights again. She summoned her dark powers, and off they were, in a large shadow the shape of a… RAVEN!

(A/N: IT'S TIME TO AUTHOR THE NOTES!!!

TAK: We are SO sorry for not updating sooner! School and stuff, ya know?

CG: Okay, we had to change this again because that Jenna girl was dumb. And TAK saw an inspirational BB-Terra video. (located here: ) LOVE TRIANGLE NESS! BE GLAD!!)


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